party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
