that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
