I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Randomize
