Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Randomize
