His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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