i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
