any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
