butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
