Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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