so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
We got so high we made milksteak
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
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