evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
