I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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