he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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