You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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