3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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