just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
