Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
