a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
she told me i tasted like america
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
