I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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