i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I supernannyed him into submission
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
