that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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