it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize