3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
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