Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize