i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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