Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
