Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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