i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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