i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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