i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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