Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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