I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
