This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
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