i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
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