The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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