so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
