Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Everything about him screamed your future.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
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