the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
you had me at cake vodka
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
