trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
