So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
