Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
