Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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