Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
