i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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