dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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