I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Randomize
