It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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