I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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