Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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