In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
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