Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
